Header Ads

The Last Smile -

Pacing my way back to hostel from Byju’s CAT classes (valley view)on a regular evening, I crossed the pilgrimage of almost every MITian guy, 1st & 2nd block followed by 13th block and then finally the 3rd & 4th block, where I made my usual stop. I took out my cellphone to make a call to the one with whom I have lived more than half of my college life (I wish it could be till my last breath). 

This was my almost everyday event to stop by the gate of the 4th block and greet the Doberman with a smile (greeting the guard gives a small advantage to the Manipal guys to stay a bit longer than the permission time near girls’ block). But that day my reason to be there was different. 

On phone: “I'm outside ur block, can u come to meet me? Reply: In a minute”. For the world it could be any regular bullshit but for me it was something I never wanted to happen. I saw her coming out of her block with a smile on her face (Ican still see her innocent lovable smiling face when I close my eyes). I opened my mouth to say hi but for the 1st time my voice choked, and I very much had expected that the same would happen. 

So I had written everything I wanted to say to her in a pen drive (Now I think why pen drive? Is it just a side effect of studying in a technical university). I noticed that today even she was trying to maintain a distance more than the usual. All I did was to stretch my lips to greet her with a smile. 

That evening neither I had the courage to speak about the reason of seeing her nor did I want to speak because I very well knew that her tender heart would get hurt  a lot more and tears would roll down her glowing cheeks. (and believe me even if her wet eyes make her looks even more beautiful I never want to see tears in it). I finally handed over the pen drive to her but tried to make this action longer than it should be for the simple reason that for the last time I wanted my palm and heart to feel the touch of her soft hands which have kiddish nails that never grow (she has a habit eating her nails). 

I broke the silence by saying “ ye last time tumse mil rhe hai.. kosis krna ki humesha apne life me sahi decision lo.. aur humesha apna khayal rakhna..” . I did not plan to say any of the above words and it was all spontaneous. I guess this day was inevitable, if not for ever then at least for a few more days but there are things we never want to happen but have to accept, things we don’t want to know but have to learn, and people we can’t live without but have to let go. 

Before she could react to the situation, I gathered all my leftover courage to gift her my last smile to end all our past fights and all the baseless fights that I could very well see following which could even lead to the end of our special bonding (which I'm glad I still have, with no strings attached) than the end I chose which just ended our any further contacts.

No comments